Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Responsibility & Blaming

Every one of us needs to take responsibility for ourselves and our lives. No matter what the circumstances, we are in charge of how we feel and how we react. People, places, or things do not run our emotional lives, we do! Instead of admitting our mistakes, and taking full responsibility for our actions, many people react and blame others (including family members, loved ones, pastors, friends, brothers and sisters in Christ, team members at work or business etc.).

When we start to blame, we start to shift responsibility from ourselves to another person or situation. As Christians we are capable of being responsible. The Christian philosopher, Michael Keeling, wrote, "We are responsible for our actions in the dynamic sense that we can overcome both the external pressures of society and environment and the internal pressures of genetics and psychology and begin to act, by the power of God in us, as people who have nothing to fear and nothing to lose." We, by the power of God within us, can take ownership of our feelings and reactions.

Ownership or responsibility is vital because, like M. Scott Peck wrote in his book The Road Less Traveled, "many, so many, seek to avoid the pain of their problems by saying to themselves: 'This problem was caused me by other people, or by social circumstances beyond my control, and therefore it is up to other people or society to solve this problem for me.'" We can not solve our problems by ignoring them or blaming external things. If we do not take full responsibility for ourselves, we are choosing to make our lives less than God intended. So when we take responsibility and ownership for ourselves we become entirely responsible for our lives, not only for our actions but for our failures to act.

So do you take responsiblity or blame others?


Kc said...

Wise words Sis. When we understand this concept we can begin to see the power God has given us to effect positive change in our life.

Kitty Cheng said...

Amen! Thanks brother! I truly believe that positive change can be effected in God's strength, if we take responsibility, rather than blaming others for our actions.

Bill Tang said...

"No matter what the circumstances, we are in charge of how we feel and how we react. People, places, or things do not run our emotional lives, we do! "

In a popular book called "The 7 habits of highly effective people", it quoted a WWII psycologist's thinking is similar to yours. The psychologist - Victor Frankl said, " We have the last of human freedom. Even we may have no chance to choose what we are facing, we have freedom to choose how we react."

I always remind myself with this sentence while facing bad things.

Kitty Cheng said...

Hey Bill, so good to see you here my dear friend! What a pleasant surprise!! :D

Yes Victor Frankl's saying is so true. We do have the freedom to choose how we react to things. It's not what happens to us, but how we react to what happens to us that matters!

Keep coming back Bill! And when are you going to have your own blog buddy?

Sabrina said...

I don't know. Sometimes I tend to blame others for my mistakes, but I guess I need to learn how to be more responsible upon myself

Kitty Cheng said...

Sabrina my dear, you can do it! Let's learn to be more responsible together in life, ministry & business!

Corry said...

Excellent post, Kitty.
I totally agree we are responsible for what we say and do and staying in God's word and instructions, it will have a positive effect on our lives.

The only thing to be cautious about it not to take on ALL responsibility. We are not responsible for how others act or what they say. That is theirs. It's too easy to take on responsibility for that as well, because it may be provoked, or be a reaction on their part, to something we did or said.

Have a blessed day, dear sis.


God's Grace.

Kitty Cheng said...

Dear Corry, thanks so much for your reminder. We shouldn't feel responsible for others behaviors, sayings or actions. I tend to do that sometimes.


audrey` said...

I agree with Corry totally.
Be responsible for our own actions only =)

Take care, Kitty dear.

Ross McPhee said...

Yeah. What Corry said.

amy said...

Great thoughts, Kitty. I agree we need to take personal responsibity for our actions. The "blame game" started all the way back to the garden of Eden. We must be careful not to fall in the same trap.

Kitty Cheng said...

Yes Audrey & Ross, I agree with you and corry =)

Kitty Cheng said...

Thanks Amy! I'm committed not to fall in the trap of the 'blame game'.