But, we must know how to ask the right questions. If questions are asked from the viewpoint of open-mindedness, of trying to learn—then the resulting answers can help to produce a mindset that is optimistic, hopeful and full of possibilities for the future. These are known as “Learner” questions. If, however, one asks questions that seek to assign blame (either to the questioner or the questioned) and are based on negative reactions (“What’s wrong with them?”)—the resulting mindset will then lead to failure, inflexibility, stress and a sense of severe limitations. These are known as “Judger” questions.
How do we avoid being Judgers and instead become Learners? The answer lies in “QuestionThinking,” a practical, easy-to-use methodology for transforming thinking, action, and results through intentional and skillful question asking. We need to consistently choose the questions that can lead them to personal and professional success.
Marilee Adams suggests twelve top questions for change, which I found very insightful:
- What do I want?
- What are my choices?
- What assumptions am I making?
- What am I responsible for?
- How else can I think about this?
- What is the other person thinking, feeling, needing, and wanting?
- What am I missing or avoiding?
- What can I learn from this person or situation? from this mistake or failure?from this sucess?
- What questions should I ask (myself and /or others?)
- What action steps make the most sense?
- How can I turn this into a win-win?
- What is possible?
What do you think of these 12 questions?