Monday, July 04, 2005

How to Cope With Feeling Bad

Last night I found myself feeling worse than I wanted to. Well I think I was pushing myself to confront a situation that made me feel bad. During dinner tonight, mum reminded me that it was dad's 'death anniversary' yesterday. As much as I still miss him so much after all these years, I couldn't believe that I had forgotten the day (July 3) that he passed away. I felt quite sad. I slept for two hours after that trying to escape from the bad feelings. I realised that I have two extreme ways of coping with bad feelings - either express them out (both verbally or non-verbally like weeping), or just avoiding them all together.

One of my counsellor friends told me once that when bad feelings come, we can help ourselves to cope by acknowledging the feelings (but not to deny them or avoid the situation). It's a good idea not to focus on the negatives or just dwell on the situation, try to do something constructive. If it is not possible to do anything constructive at that point, focus on doing something else. I wonder if my crying or sleeping was focussing on doing something else.

So how do you cope with feeling bad?

6 comments:

Christop said...

I listen to music (often the soundtrack to Magnolia) or eat stuff. But I think a lot of the time I don't mind feeling bad now.

Kitty Cheng said...

Magnolia? Wow i should get myself a copy of the soundtrack hehe.

Christop said...

They have copies of it at Dragonfly Discs in the city, for about $10.

Christop said...

Dragonfly Discs - 21-23 Elizabeth Street.

Kitty Cheng said...

cool thx christop :) i'm already feeling better now (without listening to Magnolia), but i think i'll get it since you recommended it mate.

Christop said...

I was thinking about it again later, and it probably wouldn't be the same if I hadn't seen the film first, though. Intertextuality.